What Causes Trust Issues – and 3 Ways You Can Overcome Them

Trust is the foundation of a healthy relationship. When trust is missing, it can be draining both for you and your partner.

Maybe you’re suspicious of your partner when they have already proven how much they care for you. You might have trouble even letting anyone else into your life.

Regardless of what challenges you're facing, a lack of trust in other people can be incredibly isolating.

Here at KMA, we’re relationship experts. We’ve spent the last 14 years helping our clients achieve loving, fulfilling relationships. We’re passionate about teaching you the skills you need to get the healthy relationships you deserve.

After reading this article, you’ll know the signs of trust issues, what can cause them, and three ways to overcome them.

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How Do You Know if You Have Trust Issues?

We all have moments of doubt in our relationships, but if you have trust issues, these moments can be ongoing and overwhelming.

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Signs you may have trust issues include:

• Self-sabotaging
• Suspiciousness of your partner
• Difficulty forgiving minor incidents
• Assuming the worst – with no evidence
• Fear of physical and emotional intimacy
• Constantly feeling like the other shoe is about to drop

Trust issues affect romantic relationships but can also cause problems in friendships and the workplace.

Understanding where your trust issues came from can help you to know how to overcome them.

What Causes Trust Issues?

Trust issues can develop throughout your life from negative experiences in relationships with romantic partners, friends, and family members.

Traumatic life events can also cause trust issues – even if another person wasn’t directly involved.

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Causes of trust issues include:

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• Being bullied or feeling like an outcast as a child
• Experiencing an accident or serious illness
• Being cheated on by a romantic partner
• Unhealthy or unsafe relationships
• Being betrayed by a friend
• Losing a loved one
• Low self-esteem

Any ongoing situation where you felt vulnerable or unable to protect yourself may have triggered trust issues.

3 Ways to Overcome Trust Issues in Relationships

Rebuilding trust can be overwhelming at first, but taking it one step at a time can help you feel more confident in your relationships with others.

Recognizing the positive aspects of your healthy relationships, working on your communication skills, and meeting with a therapist are three helpful options.

1. Identify Positive Aspects of Relationships You Do Trust

Do you have a great relationship with your sibling? Do you have a best friend you trust completely?

Looking at the positive aspects of your close relationships lets you identify what makes you feel safe. Recognizing the areas of your life where you already do trust other people can help you become more confident in yourself.

These positive qualities can serve as a model for what you want in romantic relationships and set you up to thrive in your interactions with others.

2. Explore New Communication Strategies

When you’re experiencing trust issues in a relationship, it can be difficult to open up to your partner about it.

Learning new ways to communicate your feelings can be a helpful way to explain what you need to make you feel more secure in the relationship.

Exploring your love language can be a great way to learn how you want to give and receive love in relationships.

3. Attend Couples Counselling

Sometimes, we all need additional support to tackle the issues we face.

Couples counselling may help if you:

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• Want support in explaining your feelings to your partner
• Need help identifying what caused your trust issues
• Wish to learn new communication strategies

Meeting with a therapist can help also you build your confidence and self-esteem. It can often be easier to take risks in relationships when you trust yourself to handle a variety of outcomes.

Next Steps for Overcoming Trust Issues

After reading this article, you now understand what can cause trust issues, signs you may have trust issues, and three ways to overcome them.

Here at KMA, our passionate team of therapists is ready to help you build the skills you need to thrive in your relationships.

Register online or contact our team directly to book an introductory appointment.

If you aren’t ready to book an appointment, read these articles for more information:

• To learn more about your attachment style, read: How Does Your Attachment Style Affect Your Relationships?
• To learn about self-sabotage, read: What is Self-Sabotaging Behaviour – and 3 Ways to Stop It
• To find a couples therapist, read: How to Find a Couples Therapist in Toronto