What You Need to Know About the Two New Love Languages
Everyone loves an online quiz – and if you took one about love languages, it might be time to take it again.
The recent addition of two new love languages can give you more insight into how you function in relationships, and learn more about how your potential partners show love, too.
Here at KMA Therapy, we know you want to learn as much as possible about love and relationships. We’re here to keep you updated on any self-discovery tools and help you understand where they come from.
After reading this article, you’ll know what love languages are and how the two new love languages can teach you more about love and relationships.
What is Your Love Language?
Your love language is a way to describe the way you prefer to express and receive love.
Learning about your love language can be a new tool to describe what you need in relationships and help you communicate more clearly with friends, family, and romantic partners.
The original five love languages are:
- Words of Affirmation
- Acts of Service
- Physical Touch
- Quality Time
- Gift Giving
Recently, the addition of two new love languages has opened up this conversation even further.
Why Did They Add New Love Languages?
The original research on love languages, conducted in the ’80s by Dr. Gary Chapman, only included straight Christian couples.
Modern researchers were curious about how love languages stood up when separated from the religious and heteronormative context in which they were created.
Eharmony created a survey to explore how people express love in the modern dating world and found that the original five love languages left some gaps.
The two new love languages are:
1. Shared Experiences
2. Emotional Security
The Two New Love Languages, Explained
While many people relate to the original five love languages, these two new additions may give you the descriptions you’ve been missing.
What Does “Shared Experiences” Mean?
If your love language is Shared Experiences, it means you want to be able to explore life alongside your partner.
You value creating lasting memories with the people you love, and it’s important to you do meaningful and impactful things.
This is different from another love language, Quality Time, because of what you’re doing with another person.
Someone who prefers Quality Time is happy to spend time with their partner – what they’re doing doesn’t matter as much as how they’re doing it. They’re happy to run errands together as long as there’s time to have meaningful conversations and be present with one another.
Someone who prefers Shared Experiences needs to be doing something engaging. Seeing a concert and screaming the lyrics together or going on a thrilling roller coaster with your hearts pounding in sync are more up their alley.
What Does “Emotional Security” Mean?
If your love language is Emotional Security, you want your partner to recognize and care for your emotional needs.
We all want to feel seen, heard, and understood. But if your love language is Emotional Security, this is one of the most important things to you in a relationship.
If your partner isn’t able to have deep, insightful conversations with you, it’s a dealbreaker.
You value honest and transparent communication above all else – and you need a partner who makes you feel safe when having difficult conversations.
How Do I Figure Out My Love Language?
There are many online quizzes available to help you figure out your love language, including a new quiz from Truity that explores the seven love languages in a new way.
However, you might recognize your love language based on the descriptions you can find online – and that works too!
It’s normal to have a few love languages that you really resonate with, and we can often have different love languages for how we express love versus how we want to receive it.
Look at your love language without judgement, and remember that it doesn’t have to be set in stone – use it as a tool for communication and to recognize what you really need from a relationship.
Next Steps for Thriving in Your Relationships
After reading this article, you know about the seven love languages, and how to identify yours.
Here at KMA Therapy, we’re here to help you thrive in your life and relationships. For over 14 years, we’ve been helping our clients learn more about themselves in order to have stronger relationships with others.
Book an appointment today or connect with our team if you have any questions.
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