How to Combat Social Anxiety During the Holidays: 10 Therapist-Recommended Tips
Vibrant holiday colours bring an overwhelming weight for those battling social anxiety.
Holidays are a season when everyone craves family and friends to be together, enjoy dinners, and have parties to shake off stress caused by work or family problems.
Amid people interacting, is there someone trying to get away from all the hustle and bustle of the party and find a peaceful corner because people make him suffocate? That might be the person fighting social anxiety.
It's no shame to accept that you are socially anxious; instead, get help from the best therapists at KMA Therapy for a better way of life. This blog will explain social anxiety and how to combat social anxiety during this holiday season.
Social Anxiety- A Deeper Look!
When it comes to social anxiety, you might think that, in this case, the person will be secluded, behaving anxiously, or above all, staying home all the time. Social anxiety is categorized by a constant fear of being judged or pressure to perform well to impress people in a social setting. James W Jefferson defines social anxiety as a “persistent fear of social situations."
In simple words, social anxiety is a disorder that is associated with a fear of a situation where one feels like he will be judged, evaluated, or scrutinized by other people present. This may involve public speaking, dating, parties, or even answering class questions.
How Do People Develop Social Anxiety?
There could be multiple reasons resulting in the development of social anxiety, and some of the major ones are stated below:
Bullying
Have you been bullied all your school life when your appearance was not "cool enough"? Or were you being called a “nerd" because you were good at studies? These kinds of situations lead to the development of social anxiety in people at an early age.
Bullying, overall, can harm the human mind, leaving them with no self-esteem. People feel insecure about performing well in public spaces when they fear being judged.
Family History
Did either of your parents have anxiety? If your answer is yes, then it is likely that you will suffer due to this genetic cause. A study conducted in 2003 concluded that there is an association between parents and children's social anxiety, meaning that children might have the same disorder as parents.
Genetic Mutation
Our genes significantly affect our physical, mental, and emotional development. However, suppose there is a mutation in our genes at some point of mitosis; we could end up with a significant disorder, physical or mental. In this case, the mutation in the CRHR2 gene can cause social anxiety, which obstructs the binding between CRF2 and CRF receptors, essential for stress reduction.
Negative Experiences
Having an abusive childhood, narcissistic parents, and bullying friends or family members can rewire our brain, causing it to think about constantly being judged by others. These experiences lead to a lack of self-confidence, making meeting people in social gatherings difficult.
Attention Drawing Appearance
People with special abilities or syndromes might draw unwanted attention. Being constantly the center of attention can be overwhelming sometimes, leading to avoiding a social situation.
What Triggers Social Anxiety
Here are some other triggers that can lead to social anxiety:
- Meeting people
- Public speaking
- Stage performance
- Being the center of attention
- Being criticized
- Answering questions in a class
- Going on a date
- Taking exams
- Eating or drinking in public
- Making phone calls
- Attending other social gatherings
Social Anxiety Symptoms
People get anxious sometimes in social situations, but this does not mean that they have social anxiety. Social anxiety or phobia is more than getting nervous in a social situation. Here is a list of some symptoms that you might see in a socially anxious person:
Physical Symptoms
- Blushing
- Shortness of breath
- Upset stomach
- Trembling/shaky voice
- Racing heart
- Sweating/hot flashes
- Dizziness
Emotional Symptoms
- Excessive self-consciousness
- Persistent worry
- Fear of judgment
- Embarrassment anxiety
- Nervousness visibility
Behavioral Symptoms
- Avoiding social interactions
- Staying silent or unnoticed
- Relying on companions for comfort
- Using alcohol to ease nerves
- Leaving situations early
- Over-preparing for conversations
- Avoiding eye contact
- Seeking constant reassurance
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10 Effective Tips To Manage Social Anxiety
So, how to overcome social anxiety? We have gathered the ten most influential social anxiety treatment tips to manage your social anxiety.
What Triggers You?
First of all, know all the triggers that cause your social anxiety. So, if big crowds intimidate you, it's essential to learn what you think in these settings that bother you, whether it is a fear of judgment, you've just got to make small talk, or just have to stay in that crowded space. If you write this down, you will start to see some patterns.
For instance, a person realizes that their anxiety spikes before speaking to authority figures. Once they have identified the triggers, they can better prepare for the situation, which can help reduce stress and build confidence.
Share Your Thoughts with a Therapist
Some people might consider this option as taboo, but going to therapy can significantly help in regulating stress. In treatment, you have a safe space to examine all your concerns without judgment.
A licensed anxiety therapist at KMA Therapy will guide you to healthier thought patterns and help you develop strategies to cope better.
Let's say that you are struggling with social anxiety, and now you have reached a point where you avoid all of the social gatherings. However, you decide to visit a therapist or attend regular therapy sessions.
This would help you learn the cognitive reconstructive techniques that will help you in the future to block negative thoughts.
A therapist can guide you through exposure therapy, where you will gradually learn to face people in social gatherings by building confidence. This could significantly reduce the chances of being isolated at gatherings.
Block The Spotlight Effect!
Do you ever feel that everyone is watching you and judging you based on your appearance or actions? That’s what a spotlight effect is. The spotlight effect represents the belief that everyone is watching and judging in life. In reality, though, most people are too egotistical to notice even minor slip-ups.
For example, you are terrified of giving a toast at a family gathering or panic at that moment, thinking that your appearance is not good enough or they will notice your nervousness and judge you for it.
However, once you determine the spotlight effect as a triggering factor of your social anxiety and understand that people are more focused on themselves rather than you, then you will be able to find ways to combat anxiety during holiday gatherings. You will feel weightless, allowing you to deliver the best toast of the season.
Try CBT
Have you tried CBT for social anxiety? It might be one of the most effective therapy for managing social anxiety. CBT can be beneficial before attending holiday events where social anxiety may peak.
Imagine a guy named Alex who is nervous about attending his friend's New Year’s Eve party, worrying about his conversation performance. However, he discovered CBT. Through CBT, he learned to challenge the negative thoughts that led to his anxiety, like "People will think I’m boring."
Alex replaced these thoughts with his therapist’s help with more realistic ones, such as "I’m good at making small conversations, and people will appreciate my company." This shift allowed him to feel more at ease during the celebration.
Try Controlling Your Breath
Social anxiety can often leave a person out of breath because of the stress of meeting new people. This is due to the activation of the fight-or-flight response.
Trying to control your breath or doing breathing exercises can contribute to the regulation of emotions and calm your senses down.
Practice deep breathing techniques to calm your nervous system. In this session, you can breathe in for 4 seconds and hold it inside the lung for 7 seconds, then breathe out for 8 seconds. You will feel calm right away.
Moreover, if you are fidgeting over work presentations, practice deep breathing. Then, you will be less anxious, and you will be able to control yourself better.
Practice Public Speaking
Public speaking can be the most significant source of social anxiety. For example, let's just say that you are anxious about attending the office dinner where some new investors will be present, and you are assigned the task of addressing the company's pros to convince the investors.
Now, one way to calm yourself is to practice breathing; another hack is to practice what you want to say beforehand. Practice in front of the mirror or with a partner before the event.
The more you practice, the less you will feel anxious and prepared to take the spotlight.
Focus on Others, Not Yourself!
Social anxiety also comes from being overly self-conscious or focused. To tackle this problem, you must shift your focus to others, especially at holiday parties where there could be increased pressure to make a great impression.
Everyone is conscious of themself and does not pay attention to others as much as you think. For example, suppose you are afraid of how you will present yourself at your family dinner with your partner's family.
In that case, you can start mixing with them by initiating a conversation about them, like "How has your work been?" or "What are your plans." As you start showing interest in others, you will become more interested and less concerned with your nervousness, making you feel relaxed.
Adopt Anti-anxiety Lifestyle
People undertake significant changes in social anxiety patterns through little lifestyle modifications like daily exercise, jogging, or doing yoga. These activities release endorphins, which tend to uplift a person's mood.
Moreover, excess intake of caffeine and alcohol must be reduced to relax anxiety because they can do the opposite and make your condition worse.
Keeping to a regular sleep schedule and eating a diet rich in whole foods will significantly lower your social anxiety symptoms. Moreover, adding mindfulness, such as meditation, will train your brain to relax even further when stressed.
Stop Overthinking
Have you ever seen yourself daydreaming or transcending into a different world while sitting in a meeting where a single action might have triggered your thoughts? Or do you expect the worst-case scenarios at all times? That’s because you let your thinking run wild, which ultimately becomes the source of anxiety.
For example, you may often replant conversations from your family's Thanksgiving dinner, worrying about whether you said the right thing.
This can be managed by learning the pattern and trying to stop by reminding that most people don't scrutinize every word. You can also set a mental timer to limit your overthinking time.
Engage in Conversations
Holidays are the perfect times to gather and mix, even with other unfamiliar faces. You might feel nervous about attending the holiday potluck in the neighborhood because you have never met most of the people.
You can take it as a challenge and try to overcome it by starting small conversations with at least three people. This will help you feel better during the night and provide an excellent way to enjoy the party much more than planned.
Struggling in Silence? Don't Face It Alone!
Living a struggling life in silence is not a solution to coping with social anxiety. Learn how to fight social anxiety, ask yourself, “how can I overcome social anxiety,” or try social anxiety therapy with KMA Therapy to live a confident life.
Don't let social anxiety hold you back. Our best anxiety therapists can help you break free from the cycle of fear and ease your anxiety in this holiday season.
Take the first step toward a more confident you—schedule a consultation today!
