Are New Year’s Resolutions Helpful or Harmful?
The start of a New Year can bring in the new energy we need to jumpstart our projects, gain back our motivation, and dream up the perfect life we’ve been waiting for.
New Year’s Day can also come with a ton of pressure. We set a bunch of goals to achieve in the next 12 months that we’re sure will make us feel better.
But if we fail to reach them, we can feel even worse than we did a year ago.
Here at KMA Therapy, we know you want to achieve your goals – and we’re here to help you do it. For over 14 years, we’ve been helping our clients create the lives they want. We’re here to help you learn how to do it, too.
After reading this article, you’ll know why so many New Year’s Resolutions fail, how to set helpful resolutions, and what to do if you’d rather not set them at all.
Why New Year’s Resolutions Fail
The idea behind New Year’s Resolutions is great – you want to feel better about yourself, you’re excited about the possibility of changing your life, and you are ready to achieve the level of success you’ve always dreamed of.
On January 1st, you write out a list of resolutions, stick it to your fridge, and feel proud about how much you’re doing to achieve this year – keeping your house clean, learning a new language, falling in love.
By the end of the week, your house is still full of deflated balloons from your New Year’s party, your Duolingo streak is already broken, and your dating apps are full of uninspiring conversations.
You feel like a failure, but it’s fine – you’ll try again next year.
If this story sounds familiar, you’re not alone.
New Year’s Resolutions often fail because:
- They're unrealistic
- They’re negative or critical
- You don’t really care about them
- You don’t believe you can actually do them
- You only made them because you felt pressured or felt bad about yourself
But whether you want to learn how to set better resolutions or throw out the tradition entirely, we’ve got the tips you need to get your year off to a great start.
3 Ways to Set Great New Year’s Resolutions
1. Set SMART Goals
Whether you’ve heard the SMART Goal acronym so many times you’re sick of it or this is the first time you’ve seen it, it’s popular for a reason: it works.
Rather than just coming up with a general idea of what you want, SMART encourages you to set detailed New Year’s Resolutions.
SMART Goals are:
- Specific
- Measurable
- Achievable
- Relevant
- Time-bound
A typical resolution might sound like: “I want to become the most famous blogger in the world!”
A SMART goal would sound like this: “I love writing and travelling, so my goal is to create a travel blog that gets 5000 monthly views by the end of the year. I’ll do this by writing one blog post a week, researching marketing techniques to help my blog grow, and sharing my posts with my friends who also love travelling.”
2. Have Accountability
Telling someone else about the goal you set for yourself can be a great way to hold yourself to it – but it’s even better if you can get someone else involved.
If you want to start taking a new dance class or visiting more art galleries, see if any of your friends want to join you.
It can be more fun to try new things with someone by your side – and having someone else invested in your goals can make you more likely to go to that dance class even when you’re exhausted from a long day of work.
3. Make Your Resolutions Hopeful – Not Critical
When setting resolutions, it’s easy to be critical of yourself. After all, you’re creating a list of things you want to be different in your life.
But deciding to frame your goals positively can help you stay motivated and feel encouraged rather than feel like a failure.
Many people have “living a more active lifestyle” on their list. If it’s on yours, the way you frame it is critical.
Instead of saying, “This year, I won’t be so lazy. I’ll get out of the house and move around so I don’t turn into a couch potato.”
Frame your goal as, “This year, I’ll prioritize my health by taking a walk on as many days of the week as I can, and visiting that park I love near my house.”
3 Things to Do Instead of Setting New Year’s Resolutions
1. Create a Vision Board
If you’re a visual thinker, creating a vision board can be a great way to remind yourself of your goals – and have a lot of fun doing it.
A vision board is a collection of pictures, words, and visuals that represent the dream life you want to live.
Whether you want to make a physical board with scissors and glue or create a virtual one on a website like Canva, it can be fun to have all your dreams represented in one space.
Throwing in a few simple steps describing how to make each vision come to life is a great way to get the momentum going.
2. Write a Gratitude List
The start of your new year doesn’t mean you have to overhaul your entire life.
The “New year new you” mindset can be overpowering and stressful – but you’re already great the way you are.
Writing a list of everything you’re grateful for in your life can be a great reminder of how much you already have while realizing what else you want to invite into your life.
If you’re still looking for an end-of-year reflection, writing a gratitude list specific to the last twelve months can be a great reminder of how far you’ve come.
3. See a Therapist
If your New Year’s Goals include things like “be less stressed about work,” “learn to love myself more,” or “feel less anxious about trying new things,” seeing a therapist might be a great way to achieve them.
It can be tempting to try and do everything yourself and you might feel like pushing through alone is the only way to achieve your goals.
But you don’t have to do everything on your own.
Seeing a therapist can be a great way to take stock of what you really want in life, learn what’s holding you back, and create an achievable plan to get what you want.
Your therapist can also give you their honest opinion, see things you may have trouble seeing yourself, and provide the encouragement you need on tough days.
Next Steps for Starting Your Year Off the Right Way
After reading this article, you now know how to set great New Year’s resolutions, and three great alternatives you can do to reach your yearly goals.
These tips will help you start your year on the right foot.
If seeing a therapist is on your resolution list, KMA Therapy is here to help. For over 14 years, we’ve supported our clients in reaching their personal and professional goals – and we’re here to help you do it next.
Book an appointment online or connect with our team to learn more.
If you’re not yet ready to book an appointment, check out these resources to learn more:
- If exercise is on your resolution list, read: Can Exercise Improve Mental Health?
- If you want to learn more about self-love this year, read: What is Self-Compassion? ( and Five Ways to Build it)
- If you want better relationships this year, read: What’s Your Love Language – And How Can it Affect Your Relationships?
